50 of the thousands of lessons my 20s taught me

While some of these lessons have lodged somewhere deep inside, many of them I have learned and unlearned and relearned again and will continue learning for the rest of my life. So with five days until I turn 30, here are just 50 of the thousands of lessons my 20s have taught me, with heartfelt thanks to every person who has helped teach me over the last ten years, and lifetime, whether you knew you were helping or not.

Who am I?

Who am I? I'm someone who feels deeply, who in any given moment feels and holds multiple conflicting, contrasting, complimentary and complex emotions, sensations, experiences, all at once and separately in individual layers, together and apart. I'm someone who believes that we, all of us, as unique and connected and complex human beings, have an … Continue reading Who am I?

21 Reasons Why Victims of Rape and Sexual Abuse Do Not Report (Told Through 21 Real Life Voices) ~ Huffington Post

Click here for the full article at The Huffington Post Throughout my life, from childhood into adulthood, I have been raped and sexually assaulted multiple times, and not once have I reported an incident. Recently I read a comment on an article I wrote about the last time I was sexually assaulted, stating they were … Continue reading 21 Reasons Why Victims of Rape and Sexual Abuse Do Not Report (Told Through 21 Real Life Voices) ~ Huffington Post

fingerprints

They asked me why I was here and I told them I didn't know. But I had some ideas. Like how a single word can take my breath away, while reminding me how to breathe again. Like how the miles that stand between us hold me closer than the one touching my hand. Like how … Continue reading fingerprints

Your life

There are moments in life when you are walking down the street and your whole world turns on its head in a heartbeat. It's happened to me, more times than I care to recall, in more ways than I wish to tell you. But it happens. You are walking down a street and something comes … Continue reading Your life

a life called survival

i didn't ask to be taken like that, all young, innocent and easily-broken into any mold of life they offered or insisted upon. i never wanted to be shaped to become the easy play-thing they desired, on any given day. i didn't change to make life harder for you, or for them, or for me. … Continue reading a life called survival

The Last Time. 

Because emotional abuse can be just as destructive as other types of abuse and this was the last time... "i don’t remember the first time we spoke, but i remember the last; words dripping from your mouth like a poison you believed i would drink. and i would have once believed it too, i was … Continue reading The Last Time. 

Please Don’t Wait For Me (I’m Not Coming Back)

I'm sorry I left you, dear one. I'm sorry I left so unceremoniously, without satisfactory explanations or word of when I would return. You see, I didn't know where I was going, or even that I had begun leaving, I just knew I couldn’t stay; I was changing, I had changed. I didn't belong within … Continue reading Please Don’t Wait For Me (I’m Not Coming Back)

Dear Childhood

Dear Childhood, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t show up for you sooner. For a long time I didn’t know you were there. And when I met you, I didn’t have room for you in my life. You see, you are an ocean and I was happily paddling in my pools of denial. I didn’t … Continue reading Dear Childhood

travelling through space {a poem}

i've been filling myself up for years  with anything that can let me live under the illusion that i do not feel empty.   because feeling it means acknowledging just what was taken from me, leaving a void so vast i could get lost in the darkness if i let myself.   there's no gravity … Continue reading travelling through space {a poem}